Being 25 means that you’re quarter a century old and that many of you will feel that you’re at an age where nothing is impossible. However, as time passes by and you look around, you begin to compare your life with others. You compare your achievements with others your age and always realise that you’re lagging way behind. You realise that others your age are making much more while you’re struggling to save for rainy days. It’s during times like these that you put yourself down more than ever, which in turn demotivates you to work harder. Once you let your guard down and let a quarter life crisis take over your life, it is hard for you to come back from it. You let your insecurities take over you and you doubt yourself more. You might question your existence and you find that you are a ticking time bomb, just waiting to blow. Fortunately, there are some things that you can do to prevent yourself to be in a rut. Here are some steps and measures to help you.
Mentally, you need to stop comparing yourself with others around you. Physically, if possible stop whatever you’re doing and do nothing. Sometimes people need to not do anything so that they’ll be a better person. It happens to me every now and then, and every time it hits me, I’d stop working and take a break for a few minutes. Sometimes you work so hard that it leaves you breathless. You don’t have to rush through things and you need to realise that “just because you took longer than others, it doesn’t mean that you failed.” It is okay to take a bit more time; remember that the tortoise wins the race in the end.
Sometimes talking to people works wonders. Talking releases stress and lifts the weight of your problems off your shoulders. Talking to people cuts your problems down and you might even get good advice or even a different perspective out of the conversation. Even if you can’t find anyone to talk to, talking to yourself is proven to have favourable benefits. According to spiritualityhealth.com, the Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology published an article, which states that people learn and cope better in difficult times when they talk to themselves rather than keeping mum. It’s the same reason why babies talk when they learn a new skill.
3. Take a breather
Take a breather every now and then. Take a walk in the park, head to the café nearby and have some coffee. Visit your parents; visit the old and the sick. Have a me-day doing things that you want to do instead of doing things that you need to do. Sometimes people need the space to move around and think or just a place to sit and stare in the air. Taking a short break away from your daily routine kills the dullness in your life and it renews your energy. It gives you ideas you’ve never thought of and the little push you need to get over the hill.
4. Take a trip
I learnt that taking a trip overseas helps me to keep me motivated and inspired. I realised that to be a better person, I need to head out and explore new places and learn new skills. Being in a completely new environment takes you out of your comfort zone and forces you to adapt to changes. Some people adapt slowly while others adapt much faster to the place that they’re in. I take at least a week’s break every year to renew myself and look for ways to improve. Being in a country that speaks differently and has different understandings allows me to grow as a person as I learn to overcome various obstacles. In return, I bring back a lot of memories that helps my creative stimuli to work better and harder.
Realise that you’re in this together with your peers. Most likely, you’re hanging out with people who are of age as yours and share the same interest as you. Use them as a motivation to be a better person. Do not quit your interests but instead take a step back and share your difficulties with the ones who care. You also need to realise that your friends might have gone through or are going through the same difficulties as you are. Go through them together and maybe your inner voice will tell you that everything is and will be alright for the future.
Have a plan for the few years ahead and don’t worry about any future major changes or obstacles. I personally have a five-year plan, which started on the day I ORD-ed from NS. According to my plan, I am right on track even though there were plenty of hiccups and difficulties along the way. Set yourself a target so that a few years down the road, you can see your personal growth and change from before. You’ll appreciate yourself more and that in turn will push you to work harder for the next phase of your life.
Resetting your lives during your quarter life crisis might be a turning point in your life. You’re around 25 years old and have seen how the world works. You’ve seen and experienced people entering your lives and leaving without saying goodbye. You might have seen death or you might have had close encounters with death itself. You might have regrets of your past which you hope to one day make amends for or you might even hope that things didn’t work out the way it did. Being the age that you’re experiencing quarter life crisis makes you evaluate the people who are important to you. You tend to focus more on quality rather than quantity and you tend to make big changes to yourself then. You know that eventually you have to let go of past memories that you hold on dearly to, to move forward. Ultimately hitting the reset button during your quarter life crisis teaches you to be aware of the present, thankful of the past and optimistic about the future.
Finally go. Go forth to achieve your aspirations and goals for the coming years. You’ll discover that the trips you’ve taken, the things that you’ve learnt, the skills that you’ve acquired, the friendships and ties that you worked on is all time well spent. In that moment after your quarter life crisis, you will notice that life is much more liveable and in that, you enter a state of acceptance.
These are not steps to ensure that your quarter life crisis experience is smooth. These eight points are mere personal experience that I’ve gathered and feel obliged to share. There’s enough suffering in this world, but having a quarter life crisis is not worth the pain to endure.
Till the next one, ciao.